25 Ways to Tell You're Grown UP!!!
Or how to tell Pistols I'm too OLD for him...sorry...
1) Your houseplants are alive, and you can't smoke any of them.
2) Having sex in a twin bed is OUT of the question.
3) You keep more food than beer in the fridge.
4) 6:00am is when you get up, NOT when you go to bed.
5) You hear your favorite song in an elevator, and you know all the words.
6) You watch the Weather Channel.
7) Your friends marry and divorce, not "hook up", and "break up".
8) You go from 130 days of vacation to 14.
9) Jeans and a sweatshirt no longer qualify as dressing up!
10) You're the one calling the police because those *^%#* kids next door won't turn down the sterio!!
11) Older relatives feel comfortable telling sex jokes around you.
12) You don't know what time Taco Bell closes anymore.
13) Your car insurance goes down and your car payment goes up.
14) You feed your dog Science Diet instead of McDonald's leftovers.
15) Sleeping on the couch makes your back hurt.
16) You take naps.
17) Dinner and a movie is the WHOLE date, not just the beginning of one.
18) Eating at basket of chicken wings at 3am would severely upset, rather than settle, your stomach.
19) You go to the drug store for Ibuprofen and antacids, not condoms and pregnancy tests.
20) A $4.00 bottle of wine is no longer "Pretty good shit!".
21) You actually eat breakfast food at breakfast time.
22) "I just can't drink the way I used to" replaces "I'm never going to drink like that again!"
23) 90% of the time you spend in front of a computer is for real work!
24) You drink at home before going to the bar to save money.
25) When you find out your friend is pregnant you congratulate them, rather than screaming, "Oh SHIT , what the hell happened!!"
26) BONUS: You read through this entire list looking for ONE SIGN that doesn't apply to you, you can't find ONE to save your sorry old ass!!! So you'll copy this and forward it to a bunch of your old friends, so they can feel as good as you do right now, and so they can say something rude back to you!!
This was sent to me by my dear friend Leah from high school. I'll be sending her a private e-mail telling her how much I appreciate being reminded of my age...
posted by Jana @ 9:19 PM
6 comments
6 Comments:
I've decided to avoid aging simply by saying, "I love to party" for the rest of my life. Take that, 26 points.
I was immediately reminded of that old guy with the walker from Family Guy... and Grandpa Simpson...boy, there's your party guys!!!
Maybe I'm NOT TOO old for you after all Pistols!!! Lemme know when you want to stop by for tea and I'll get my great-great grandson to stop by and oil my rocking chair gliders so they don't squeek and I can hear you - once I turn up my hearing aid that is....=-).
I like ladies with hearing aids, because let's face facts, most of the things I say deserve a slap. If she can't hear me, we'll both be better off.
Well--problem there Pistols, I'm a very accomplished lip-reader. Been DEAF for so long I had to learn to read lips so I could stop saying "WHADJA SAY??? HEY??? WHAWAZZAT???"
Better be careful or Kat is going to get jealous and we're both going to get the Canandian Mounties on our doorstep.
#25 is really funny... yes I still post at barkingloud.blogspot; haven't checked the e-mail for a while, sorry... looks like you have an interesting lead. Good Luck!
When I read this I realize that I am getting old, lol !
I am back from my holidays, it was just great. I had wonderful weather and my friends are such nice people. Unfortunately I catched a cold in the train back, and don't feel very well. My cats had holidays with Mr. Gattino who fed them too well ! Arthur is really fat now !
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